I found an itty bitty baby snake in the house and I told my parents and my mom nearly had an aneurysm
I WANT SOMEONE TO NAME A BEE SPECIES AFTER ME
I’m really digging her criminal genius mastermind outfit
DUDE NO WHAT
I just dropped my phone and now the switch and buttons on the side aren’t working I’m fired
I just bought a new bottle of top coat Guess where it is now If you guessed “in my bathroom trash in a million pieces” then you are correct
It’s not okay to put people on the spot when they’ve got peanut butter in their mouth
dementors replied to your photo: Got my hurr all did omg so cute :3 aww thanks
I just had to drag Bella out of a shrub and sternly tell her “The bees don’t want to be friends with you. Leave them alone.”
I am going to eat all of the Cheez-its out of this Cheez-it snack mix and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop me because I’m an adult
Spadefoot toads are both adorable and menacing which is why I love them
pinfeathers-and-gollyfluff replied to your post: Angry text post about how dumb finals are I cannot like this enough. I’ve been 100000% done with this semester since like, the second day of classes. I JUST WANT IT TO BE OVER ALREADY.
Angry text post about how dumb finals are
I deleted my old twitter and made a new one in case you were wondering
I got 99 problems and having way too much shit on my desk accounts for about 92 of them
phantomganon96: Well this is heartbreaking. But hey what else is new on this show.
Wow can we please not have this super tragic storyline
I told your mom I’d keep you safe… so I’ll drag you in front...– Miles
GOD DAMMIT EMMA THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS
That’s just good advice. Don’t piss off bridge-folk.– Zack
Ashley B: Aladdin came out the year we were born.
Anna: I think Beauty and the Beast came out in 1991 too.
Me: And Snow White came out in the 50s, when Zack was born.
Ashley B: You know they make spray on hair now?
Zack: Yeah, they've had that since like, the 70s.
Charlotte: Well you would know.
If you show me sad fanart, I will slap you. Charlotte can attest to this.
One of my friends just became a citizen today I didn’t know she wasn’t a citizen…
I really need to start putting last names in my phone contacts because I’m sitting here going “Who the fuck is Britney?!”
I think the Rockstar drink I got is supposed to be for hangovers? Great now the guy at Union Express probably thinks I’m some kind of degenerate.
Who’s that person lurking around outside the computer lab waiting for it to open? That would be me.
I think Macy is scared of the storm I think this because she kept coming into my bathroom and staring awkwardly at me while I was in the bathtub
Would it be weird to tell a professor that you love them for curving final grades a lot? I’m asking for a friend. By that I mean myself.
“I’m so glad that all of these extinct, ancestral animals are so distinctive looking” said no one ever
Dear guy that sits next to me in paleontology, everyone could hear you blasting Avril Lavigne when you got to class. I’m not judging you but other people probably are. Turn your music down.
EMMA GETTING UPSET IS MAKING ME UPSET
Norman leaves voicemails the same way I do: awkwardly.
baka-ki-el-dogura: …..That’s not a bagel…… Poor Dylan. He was actually kinda excited about eating that bagel.
Me: Why are you boiling cabbage?
My mom: Science.
I am browsing through online forums for information about mourning doves This is what my life has come to
Instead of actually working on an assignment I’m just texting my friend from that class complaining about how much I don’t want to do the assignment
My grandma turns 90 tomorrow. How legit is that?
I should get up and work on my animal behavior paper that’s due tomorrow or study for my chemistry exam on Wednesday or do any number of the other things I need to do this week but my bed is so comfortable and warm. Someone needs to do all my homework for me.
One of my friends is watching season 2 of the Walking Dead and she’s freaking out about a character dying and I’m about a second away from just being like SPOILERS THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE AT SOME POINT